Grade Five Alive!

We have been learning about using “golden bricks” to make our writing more powerful. These are the five necessary building blocks to give an “expository pillar” strength: quote, statistic, amazing fact, descriptive segment, and anecdote. We hope you enjoy the following superior examples of descriptive segments.

“Can you imagine colorful fireworks bursting in the sky and Disney characters greeting you at a big beautiful castle? Rides, food, and wind blowing in your hair on a fast roller coaster and having dinner with Cinderella. You would wish you never went home.” ~Tayleece

“Picture a hot summer day, with the cool breeze blowing on you, and the towering waves as you jump into the salty ocean. Or even tasting that scrumptious ice cream from the ice cream truck. It all happens at the beach.” ~Kaitlin

“There’s nothing like a death-defying roller coaster ride at Six Flags. You can hear kids and teenagers screaming at the top of their lungs as they feel the blood going to their heads while doing loop-de-loops on the Mind Eraser. There’s water in your eyes from the wind blowing against you.” ~Tori

“I love the way you hear Happy Birthday in your ear at parties. You taste wonderful sugary goodness in your mouth. The feel of the wrapping paper crinkles on your hands. I enjoy the sight of games and guests enjoying themselves. I love birthday parties.” ~Cassie

“Lights flash, bells jingle, and their owners ask for money. Hundreds of Americans seem to flash all around. You can feel them bump and smash into you as Christmas songs blare on the mall speakers. Wreaths hang above every store. Can you imagine that?” ~Koby

Photo courtesy of Pics4Learning.com

Picture this…..

The skaters rush past, sticks clashing. The air is filled with the smell of excitement. He gets the puck, sailing down the ice handling the puck with pure ease. He dodges the defense men. It’s just him and the goalie. The crowd holds its breath just waiting for something to happen. SLAP! The puck lifts off the ice and soars through the air toward the inside of the net. The goalie tries to save it but it’s too late. The puck flies over his glove and hits the back of the net. The buzzer sounds loudly, and the crowd cheers and screams at the top of their lungs. The game is over. 0 to 1.

~Kelly

Poems make most people feel good. Every person has a favorite thing, and poets capture feelings in the poems that they write. Every poet has a reason for writing poems. Mine is that it makes me feel calm. In these poems above I have captured the beauty of books and the twinkle of the morning star.

~Margaret

It has been a busy week and a few days since a student post : (

I want to thank all the students for patiently waiting for their turn to blog. In any event, there has been a lot of writing going on in Room 246 this week, and I’m very proud of how much effort everyone put into their “favorite holiday” pieces.

Writing isn’t easy, especially when we’re learning to make our writing better — more effective, more powerful. The process of writing comes more easily to some people, but everyone needs to push themselves to make improvements every step of the way: Planning, Organizing, Writing, Revising and Editing.

Remember to use the Empowering Writers binder as a reference.

Keep up the good outstanding work. (No ho-hum words.) Back to blogging next week!

~Mrs. S